96 replies to this topic

[octorok]

BOOO-YA!! thanks man I appreciate it! Man it's been a crazy week haha :-P

[Fabbrizio]

Oh...then that's the right answer.

Also octorok, you've still got a [ next to your link.

[Fabbrizio]

Oh...then that's the right answer.

Also octorok, you've still got a [ next to your link.

EDIT: Sorry for the double post...

EDIT 2: Election forum is now open (for debates and such).

http://www.freewebs....cussionroom.htm

Edited by Powerbracelet, 27 September 2008 - 01:58 PM.

[Fabbrizio]

ALRIGHT!!!!

Now, as the final entry date is coming up, I would like to ask you to, if your name is not on the list and you are supposedly signed up, to PM me about it.

Also, if you support a candidate but you are not one, and you would like to be on the mailing list, please PM me.

[Fuzzy]

So, how are y'all doing on your opening speeches? I'm going to try to go ahead and grab votes early and often, having just finished mine.

I am, as of 12:00 AM CDT tomorrow, open to debates of any format except for Lincoln-Douglas, regarding any policy subject.

Also, tell me if I start to take things too seriously.

[Russ]

I think the opening speech will be my hardest part. But I will stick with this!

[AaronJer]

A vote for octorok is a vote for our children's future's freedom. Don't be a pig-dog. Vote smart, vote safe, vote soon, vote Octorok.

Paid for by the brown-noser's society.

[Alestance]

I'm sorry. I have to drop out. It involves some personal problems that I have to deal with

[Fuzzy]

It looks like my speech is so huge that the freewebs forum is going to take 10+ minutes to post it, and I have ten minutes until I have to leave for my bus, so I'll post it here:



Thank you, thank you. Alright, as has already been leaked, it is true that today I announce my run for the President of the United States. Allow me to show you where I stand.

(coughs)

My fellow people, as I am quite sure you know by now, our economy is in a train wreck. The housing market is falling apart, unemployment is rising, and the U.S. dollar is worth less than ever before.
Well guess what. I have a plan that I believe that, although it will not be some sort of fantasy cure-all to our money problems as some others have described, but I believe that it will, overall, lead to the brightest economic future for us all.

Every year, American businesses either make or create goods worth about 13.8 trillion dollars. That's a lot of money. Then add 14 trillion, all the income Americans made in 2006. Take away the 5 trillion that the government will use implementing my plan, and divide it by 260 million adult U.S. citizens. The end result is about 87 thousand bucks.

87 thousand bucks. Imagine all the hard-working people in the country that currently are forced to hover just a bit above the poverty line, starting to make somewhere around 87K, depending on the skill and dexterity needed to complete their jobs, of course. You see, my system will not be a traditional Marxist or Leninist system. The hard-studying, ethical, well mannered, going-to-grow-up-and-be-a-doctor people WILL in the end have more wealth and sucess in life than the "Who cares" Straight-C students who waste their lives sitting around and watching Sanford & Son. Not that Sanford & Son is a bad show; I like it very much; but if you are an apathetic moron, then nobody is going to give you anything but basic healthcare and barely-livable-on food supplies. In the end, it will not be a huge departure from what we have today, but it will do a few things: No exuberant salaries or pensions for corporate uptights, No inequality in the labor-pay ratio, a chance for everybody to recieve a higher education, and healthcare for everybody. I think that these are all things that Americans want.

Well, anyways, enough with the economy. You probably think that I'm some sort of Liberal-Statist maniac, possibly on a low dose of LSD. Well, this is not so. In fact, as I'm sure you'll agree, the ONLY place I'm like that is my economic ideal. We have a few more topics to cover in this speech...

like gun control. At the moment, the United States has the highest murder per capita rate in the world. On this one, well, I really have no idea how to lead up to this, so I'll spit it out nice an quick. I want Congress to enact mandatory gun ownership for mentally competent adults without a conviction for murder, assault, kidnapping, or espionage, and less than two convictions for robbery, theft, threat of murder, or cannibalism. As a complement to this, there will be multiple and numerous seminars on gun safety held throughout the country. If anybody tries to kill anybody, and they get killed in the victim's defense, there's an investigation, they find that this is the case, and everybody else goes on with their lives.

Also, let's look at taxes. I wholly support and am a proponent of the idea of a consumption tax. More specifically, I like the FairTax. Long story short, it's a drastically increased, national, end-customer-only sales tax, that is so high that it replaces the income tax. The idea behind it is that it gives people who are willing to live frugally the opprotunity to save up for a better retirement, invest in stocks and bonds, etc., wheras an income tax akes money away from you the minute you recieve it. I love this plan, and our 10000-page-long tax code has needed replacement or at least a big adjustment for a long, long time.

Where do I stand on foreign policy issues, you ask? Well, I can tell you right now that if I am elected, you're going to be seeing a whole lot less Secretary of State and a whole lot more UN Ambassador. Right now, just about any european will tell you that the American leaders are arrogant fools. We need much, much more cooperation with our overseas partners in regards to instability in the middle east, human rights, trade, and environmental protection. If I wake up in the White House on the morning of January 11, then I can tell you that the minute I finish brushing my teeth, I will get on a bus to New York to do what I can to patch up relations with these nations that, although they used to be strong allies, due to the pathetic ruling of George W. Bush they now stand neutral or hostile.

Now, I'll move onto the environment. The current administration has contributed more in the form of legislation to the polluting of air, water, and earth than those of Clinton, Bush Sr. and Carter combined. It's simply unacceptable. My son has asthma, and I can tell you that I doubt he could survive without a respiratator if my family lived in Detroit or New Jersey. Allow me to promise to you, my fellow Americans, that if I am elected the first treaty I sign will be the Kyoto Protocol.

Lastly, I want to say that another one of the things I will be promoting in the White House will be transparency in the government. Every citizen needs to have the right to know what happened in Congress, what bills executive officials singned, what the government's goals and agendas are, and precisely how they plan to reach them. So today, I will say right now that if anybody has any questions on my positions, they can send them right over to me via PureZC PM, which if you're an eligible voter you obviously have acess to, and I will answer every single one of them. To my fellow candidates, I am open to all your debate challenges, and assure you that in such a contest, I would destroy you. Because I have every confidence in the American people that they will see it is the leadership of the blue party and I that will take them to their greatest heights.

Thank you, and good day.


EDIT: Changed hug to huge and widened the space between the sentence explaining why this isn't on the freewebs site instead and the actual speech.

Edited by fuzzyman, 01 October 2008 - 07:43 AM.

[Fabbrizio]

Alright...first day of opening speeches and the floodgates are already opening!

So Alestance is dropping out? And sir Johnamus, if you drop out now, there's no coming back even if people want you to. Either way, I hope whatever personal problems are going on for Alestance somehow get worked out.

I would also like to announce that as Sir Johnamus and Alestance are backing out, Billy Ronald has clinched the independent space in the finals. However it would still be to his advantage to participate in the election for the sake of his standing against the two major parties.

So now we're down to the following candidates in the election (Billy Ronald is not included in this list)

RED PARTY:
Link Mystro
LostInHyru1e

BLUE PARTY:
Russ
Octorok
Lemon
Fuzzyman

[Fuzzy]

On the freewebs site, I noticed that there is not only a forum for primaries and a forum for the finals, but also a forum for the "secondaries". We don't have those in the U.S., so could you explain what they are?

[Fabbrizio]

On the freewebs site, I noticed that there is not only a forum for primaries and a forum for the finals, but also a forum for the "secondaries". We don't have those in the U.S., so could you explain what they are?

I need to chane that. I was still working out how the election would go when I set that up. Removed.

Edited by Powerbracelet, 02 October 2008 - 04:29 PM.

[Fuzzy]

Oh gosh. I know that opening speeches have only been open for three days, but it seems much, much longer for some reason. I don't mean to rush anybody, but I'd really like to know what kind of people I'm going up against, or at least have something to look forward to regarding the election. Maybe I've gotta stop taking this so seriously. Maybe I should go run for an office in school council (On second thought, no, I want to win becuase I recognize that cell phones are a distraction in class, not because I'm popular.).

Worst case scenario for me, in my mind, is not that I get stomped by some right-wing, pro-affirmative action, warmonging capitalist, but rather that I win because I'm the only one running.