Hey guys, it's another long boring life story about me again. I really hope you all don't mind - I've been trying to hold this back to avoid creating pity and drama, this one has a good ending at least... so I don't want anyone feeling sorry for me. I just need to vent this out. It's really all I need.
Last month, I found out my little sister was being bullied. She cried to me about it, I couldn't help but hug her and tell her they were not worth it. See, before I go on, she has very strong autism, she can overreact and sometimes she doesn't listen to me and others around her. She tells me she wants to make friends, but no one wants to be friends with her. I tell her I'm here and will always be for her until the end. I want to make her happy as long as I can. But I was useless, the week after, she tried killing herself. I was the one to stop her. I almost witnessed something mentally scarring. The whole moment felt so surreal to me... surreal in a nightmare sense. My sister refuses therapy. But I've been doing more than I can to try and make her happy and I will make sure of it. I will be there for her more. I'll be the best big brother I can possibly be for her. I want her to wake up and sleep happily. It's my duty as a older brother.
I got the news a few weeks ago that my cousin was murdered at a party. I didn't know him well, but he is my family. I talked to him on occasions. He and I seemed to share the same interests... but he had a brighter future. I was kinda jealous when I heard all the special treatment he got when it came to his education... I miss him, but I'll stay strong for him.
Another thing is that I got kicked out of school... I mentioned this before, but never gave a reason. I gathered up my courage and I can now admit what I did... I did something awful. A guy who has bullied me for four years straight ended up getting his arm and nose broken by me. He did some awful stuff to me -- tried to take my girl friend, death threats, etc. It pained me and he stopped my will to progress in school and socialize. Of course, I did wrong, and I'm ashamed...
For 16 years, I had no idea what I wanted to be. But now I do. No, not just a teacher, but a good friend who devotes himself to making others lives a bit brighter. I will ignore the people who dislike me for their sake and bystanders' sake too. I'll now be the bigger and mentally older person. I promise not on just PureZC, but in life in general. It's time I gathered up self respect and try my best to reach these goals.